But YOU Picked the Dresses!

I like to plan ahead.  I like to anticipate problems and try to avoid them if at all possible.  It was no different with my wedding.  I had seen enough sitcoms and movies to know that all bridesmaids hate their dresses.  I mean ALL bridesmaids.  It never fails, the bride picks a color that looks great on her but awful on the girls that are actually going to be wearing the dresses.  Or the bride chooses a type of dress that does nothing but accentuate the bulges and bumps that the bridesmaids have tried to diet off or cover up for years.  And I have never heard a bridesmaid say, “I know I used my life savings to buy this dress for the wedding, but it is ok because I will wear it ALL the time!”

Since I am a plan-ahead type of person and I knew that ALL bridesmaids hate the dresses the brides choose for them to wear, I decided to do things a little differently.  I decided to choose a color that I knew my bridesmaids could wear again.  I choose black.  Who doesn’t need a nice black dress?  And I also left the style up to them.  I told them that the dresses didn’t have to all match each other.  Each girl could choose a black dress in a style that would flatter her own body and that she would feel good in.  I thought I was being the perfect bride.  How much nicer could I be?  They could set the price and the style and get a dress that they would be able to wear again and again.  I was ready to receive my Bride of the Year award any day.

But instead of an award, I got complaints.  Although I said they didn’t have to match, my bridesmaids disagreed.  They decided to get together and choose the same dress.  My two best friends looked through countless magazines and narrowed it down to 3 styles.  Then they met with my sister to see which dress she wanted.  She made her choice and they ordered them.  I thought they all looked lovely.  But I never saw one of them wear their dress again.  Once I made the mistake of asking why.  What I heard made my blood boil.  My best friends said the dreaded words that I had taken great pains to avoid, “We didn’t really like the dresses.”  I looked at them with incredulity.  “YOU picked out the dresses in the first place, how could YOU not like them?”  Here I chose black for a summer wedding color so they could have something to wear again, I allowed them to choose the style, the dress, the price, everything and they didn’t really like the dresses.

So here is my take home message…you can’t please everyone.  (or in my case anyone!)

Posted via email from Diamond Marriage


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One Response to “But YOU Picked the Dresses!”

  • WOW – I would have thought black would be a classy choice and one that everyone would have been happy with. I think maybe they were all trying to make each other happy and you were trying to make them happy – LOL. Tip to the Bride its your wedding pick what you want and just make yourself happy!

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